Still waiting…

So yet another week where I have nothing positive to report. I did have one company ask me for my list of references and I got CRAZY EXCITED and started looking for apartments (really just out of excitement more than anything else) and just hoping hoping maybe this is the end. Then I talked to the recruiter on Friday afternoon and it turns out the company is down to 3-4 final candidates. This strikes me as kind of odd: 1 or 2– that makes sense. It’s come to 2 in another situation where I wasn’t selected. And it sucks. But 3-4? I guess a lot can be learned in talking to references to sway the decision one way or the other. But shoot, you’d think they’d have a stronger sense of who they want at this point. So just waiting and hoping I guess.

I also noticed that a role at a company I had interviewed at previously opened up. It’s a contract role but at this point, anything would be fine. In that case (I think I posted) they ended up going with an internal contractor that had been there forever. So that was a bummer too.

I’m just so tired of being always the bridesmaid, never the bride. When will it be me? Lord– this is taking forever and I just feel like shit, I must suck at something– maybe it’s interviewing or whatever. Why can’t I make this happen? What am I doing wrong? The feedback I have received is 1) somebody was a better fit or 2) we are reconsidering the role. My friends have asked me whether I am perhaps bad at interviewing (I’m better than the average but maybe not among the best when it comes to the elites) or something along those lines. But damn– being close but no cigar: it’s no better and sometimes makes you feel shittier for having the credentials but being outbid by a dollar.

So I spent Friday afternoon applying for some other roles. I have one phone screen next week. Hopefully there will be others. Would like the process to be coming to an end but know that I gotta keep feeding the pipeline and hoping for the best.

— DOA

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